27 September 2006
Thirteen things you shouldn't do while driving..

1. No text messaging. Talking on a cell phone is bad enough - have safe text. Do it when you are parked.

2. Don't beat your kids...especially if they are in the backseat and you are in the front. You have to aim to smack them and yet you must keep your car on the road. You can smack them later.

3. Don't car surf. Car surfing as the passenger is bad enough. Don't do it if you are the driver; that's just begging for trouble.

4. Don't put on your make up and drive. Get your you know what up out of bed earlier if you feel you must clog your pores. You could always wait til you get to work and do it in the bathroom.

5. Do not participate in a high speed chase unless you are a police officer on duty. Do I really need to elaborate? Rent a cops not required.

6. Do not dig for something in your glovebox while driving.

7. Do not fix your hair while driving.

8. Do not look to run over animals to stop and shovel up for dinner.

9. Do not look for your cell phone in the floor of the car while operating your motor vehicle. Eyes on the road, not the carpet.

10. Do not eat food that requires silverware.

11. Do not stop at a green light.

12. Do not drive the wrong way on a one way street and then HONK at the people going the right way. Most annoying - almost head pinching annoying.

13. Do not throw objects at other vehicles. Your luck, the vehicle will have an angry redneck in it that doesn't like things near his truck.
posted by -atomik kitten @ 8:12 PM  
  • At 10:05 PM, Blogger Libragirl said…

    I'm sending you an email on this.

  • At 6:12 AM, Blogger Ghost said…

    Don't do them all at the same time, either. ;)

    Have a Happy!

  • At 6:30 AM, Blogger Lindsay said…

    HAHAHAHAHAAA! I Love this list!

  • At 6:36 AM, Blogger Colleen Gleason said…

    Great list!

    I had a friend who, kid you not, put on her pantyhose while she was driving.

    She was wearing a skirt and it got tucked inside the back of her pantyhose...so when she got to her appointment, her butt was hanging out, her skirt tucked in.

    Mine's up too!

  • At 6:37 AM, Blogger Shannon said…

    Great list! Too funny.
    Have a great Thursday!

  • At 7:28 AM, Blogger Carmen said…

    next week, you'll have to post the "do"s - do go the speed limit. Do use your turn signals, etc. :)

  • At 7:29 AM, Blogger Anthony said…

    Something tells me you've seen all these things. I know I've seen a lot of them.

  • At 9:08 AM, Blogger Knitting Maniac said…

    Great list, and very true words to live by!

    Happy TT!

  • At 9:10 AM, Blogger JO said…

    these are common sense... yet, some [weirdos] people are still doing it.

  • At 9:15 AM, Blogger Caylynn said…

    Great list! :) Thanks for the laughs with some of them. "Safe text" - too funny! :D Happy TT. :)

  • At 12:23 PM, Anonymous Nikki said…

    8 -- made me laugh so hard! Haha...I say...I've always wondered if I would be a good driver...and I've planned on learning how to drive...but sometimes I'm just too damn scared...maybe in time, I'll learn how. Not now tho...my TT is up, drop by if u can =)

  • At 12:35 PM, Blogger Nancy said…

    Maybe you should add daydreaming to the list. Yesterday I stopped at a flashing yellow light because of it. Luckily, no one was behind me.
    My 13 are at

  • At 2:33 PM, Anonymous Cheryl said…

    How funny! I love the roadkill one.

  • At 3:06 PM, Blogger Jenny Ryan said…

    Excellent advice! :)

  • At 7:25 PM, Anonymous Domestic Geek said…

    Great list--too bad the people who need it probably won't read it. Happy TT!

  • At 7:33 PM, Blogger Lisa said…

    LOL They were pretty funny! And that comment about the pantyhose? Hilarious!

    Thanks for stopping by Snarkypants and cheering me up over my lame post! :)

    Have a good weekend!

  • At 9:35 PM, Blogger Margaret said…

    Girl you crack me up!

  • At 12:07 AM, Blogger Chelle Y. said…

    Great advice! :)

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