70. You shall refrain from trying to pet a giant panda while you are drunk.
It probably isn't a great idea to get in there when you are sober either...unles you are a trainer. But this moron wasn't. Of course he got bit, but what sent me over the edge was when he bit the panda back!! So let's see...the panda is asleep, the drunkard jumps into the cage and tries to touch it, the panda is startled and bites him on the leg, the drunkard gets angry and kicks the panda, the panda bites his other leg, and eventually the drunkard bites the panda back.
Just because an animal "seems to get along well with people" doesn't make it so. Lions in captivity like people...people give them food. Sometimes lions are too hungry to wait. Then they try to eat the zookeeper. They like people all right...for freaking dinner!
What REALLY takes the cake is that the authorities are not considering a punishment for this moron. Okay, so he probably got what he deserved and that was a good punishment....yet something tells me that he hasn't learned his lesson.
The panda would probably be smart enough to wait for the guy to fall asleep and THEN eat him. Nothing better than a little wine (wino) with your meal or for the panda...as your meal. :)
I'd pet a panda on a dare! LOL!
http://www.verydodgy.com/pics/people/good_wife.htm